Saturday, September 8, 2012

Regret and Results

Forgive me Jean Nidetch, for I have sinned. It has been 70 days since my last Jello mold.

Summer wreaked havoc on my Retro Weight Watchering. And it shows.

Sure - I could sit here and make lots of excuses about how busy I have been or how tired I am after a long day of work or play. I could go on and on about my job, my crazy schedule, or my countless obligations. But I know all too well that excuses don't fly when it comes to Jean. She always knows the truth.

In fact - If Jean had given me a call last week, I think our conversation would've gone a little something like this:

Mimi: Oh hello, Jean... Guess what? I am totally NOT eating chili cheese fries right now. 

Jean: Uh. Mimi, dear - stop what you're doing, put down the french fries, and go eat a grapefruit.

Mimi: But Jean, I'm just so tired of eating cottage cheese and celery and gelatin. I just want to eat whatever I want.

Jean: Darling. Everything we eat, or don't eat, shows up on the scale eventually.

Mimi: Ugh. I hate the scale.

Jean: Stop whining and suck it up!

Mimi: Ouch.

So here I am. Sucking it up.

It starts with breakfast. My sad punishment of a breakfast is 100% Retro WW legal, and I eat it with the knowledge that it is just the first step back to a routine that isn't easy. It isn't fun. It isn't for wimps.

But as Jean says:
If you feel strongly about having a body that you like, then surely you don't have to love cottage cheese, surely you don't have to get excited about a tossed salad with lemon juice, surely you don't have to lose your cool over a strip of green pepper. You simply have to love the end result.    --The Story of Weight Watchers, 1970
You know what? I do love the end result, so I am totally going to get myself super excited about this sad excuse for a breakfast. Woohoo! Hell yeah!!!

Apple "Danish"

1 medium apple, cored and sliced
1/3 cup water
Artificial sweetener
1 slice enriched bread, toasted
1 ounce hard cheese

Combine apple and water in blender and process 30 seconds. Pour into saucepan and bring to boil. Cook 2 to 3 minutes. Cool and add sweetener to taste. Place apple mixture on toast, top with cheese. Broil until bubbly and brown.

Check out my mad portion control skillz, yo

Cooking a pureed apple is very humbling
Legal? Damn Straight.


Anyhoo. Breakfast is done. Now what's for lunch?

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